While on vacation visiting some friends of mine,
They decided one evening at a Smorgasbord we’d dine.
I had never been to one, but was told they had food galore
And you could eat and eat and eat, until you could eat no more.
Well, I was pretty hungry so that suited me all right,
And I decided I was going to sample everything in sight.
What they failed to tell me was — you go back more than once,
So on my first trip, I must admit, I acted like a dunce.
Soon we stood before a table piled high with delicious food,
There was everything imaginable and it all looked so good.
Then they handed me a little plate, about five inches around.
I didn’t say a word, but my face took on a frown
And I thought, “Oh, yes, I get it, these folks are pretty wise,
They know you can’t get too much food on a plate of this small size”.
I thought, “I’ll fool them, I’m going to get a lot,
What I can’t get around the side, I’ll pile up on the top”.
For an appetizer, I took a delicious looking peach,
Of half a dozen salads I took a little bit of each.
Then some green beans, an ear of corn and candied sweets and French fries, too,
Some chicken, roast beef, ham — and Oh, I just couldn’t pass up Irish stew.
By this time that little plate was filled to overflowing,
And I was only half way ’round — so I just kept on a going.
Desserts, Oh they looked delicious — which one should I try
Finally I decided on banana cream pie.
Then I saw orange Jello, and I like that stuff a lot,
So I thought, “I know, I’ll make pie a la mode and put the Jello on the top”.
By this time I had all that I could handle and wondered if I’d be able
Without spilling half of what I had to get back to my table.
After a lot of juggling, I managed it all right,
But when I reached my table, I lost my appetite.
My friends took one look at me, let out a little gasp,
Then they started to laugh and laugh and laugh.
Have you ever been the victim of some other people’s-fun
And you stand there like a yokel, wondering just what you have done?
After a good laugh at my expense, they made me a little wiser
And said, “O, my dear, that little plate was just for your appetizer
They will give you a large one for your hot food for the same amount of cash”.
But I sat down to eat — SMORGASBORD HASH!
My nerves were no mixed up, I felt like I’d had a beating,
My food was no mixed up, I couldn’t tell what I was eating.
I felt 1 had io oiil II lor II would bo n shame to waste it,
But if there was anything good about it, I’m sure I couldn’t taste it!
Then I took one bite of my dessert — Io swallow it I knew I’d die
For that orange Jello was fish salad on top of banana pie!
Well, I learned from my sad experience that it never pays to hoard,
It is best to go for seconds — especially at a Smorgasbord!
