Elmer was a jitter-bug and liked other kinds of sports.
One day he played some ping-pong in a pair of dark blue shorts.
It was down in Mickey’s basement and her Mom had washed that day,
She had a pan of starch left she hadn’t thrown away.
At the little ping-pong ball Elmer took a lusty swing,
His paddle only whisked the air it didn’t hit a thing.
Somehow his feet got tangled and from under him they flew,
He sat right in that pan of starch and came up filled with goo.
You should have seen that starch pan, it was pancake flat
And Elmer was dripping wet especially where he sat.
He surely did look funny and it made us laugh a lot,
But it wouldn’t have been so funny if that starch had been hot.
Growing up, I was close to Elmer “Ray” Poor Elmer has always been my favorite